Sexuality after birth, women’s healing massage Yoni massage – expert talk with Eliza Dadak.
On Wednesday May 4th, 2022 our expert talk took place with Eliza Dadak, Sexological Body Worker and Sexual Empowerment Coach. Eliza gives gynecological massages and yoni massages, is a doula and mother of a 15-year-old daughter. Eliza’s passion and calling is to work with and accompany women.
Gynecological massage is a gentle massage technique that supports women in all phases of their life. Gentle stroking techniques are used to massage the back, stomach and pelvis, arms, legs, but also the hands and feet. The hormonal balance and the female metabolism are brought into balance and female strength is strengthened.
The Yoni massage comes from the ancient Tantra technique and is the name for the massage of the female genitals. In Sanskrit, Yoni means both “sacred place” and a unity of vulva, vagina and uterus. This massage helps the woman to heal from injuries or bad experiences, especially after giving birth.
Attached is the interview with Eliza:
Why do women come to you?
Many women think they have an issue like no desire for sex, no libido; they don’t feel their body or themselves properly. There are also women who had a perineal tear during childbirth and then feel numb where the scar is. Or, for example, they were injured on their labia or labia. However, I also have women who come to enjoy and relax. You want to feel your feminine energy again. The woman-to-woman massage is very nourishing. The massage does not have any erotic goals, but rather a maternal and protective energy.
How can injuries be healed through your massage?
I do a yoni mapping with the woman. The woman leads me to exactly the point where it burns, pulls or is painful. Pain manifests itself very differently; it can be a hot, cold or dull pain. This pain can be massaged out with targeted finger movements. The woman guides me most of the time. I often integrate this procedure into the yoni massage if the woman requests it. Sometimes one session is enough and the pressure or negative feeling disappears.
«Dancing gets the female energy flowing. Women should do it more often.»
How do you explain that sometimes it only takes one session to achieve significant improvement?
A lot can be solved in the area of the Yoni via the meridians (energy nervous system) that are stimulated and the blood circulation, which works better again. For example, if a woman has pain during sexual intercourse, she explores this pain during the massage and through the interaction of breathing and feeling we find out together whether the pain is actually physical or more emotional and psychological.
From my research into the teachings of Taoism, or the mystical teachings of Hinduism regarding femininity, I find that the Yoni is a woman’s power and energy center. What kind of experience did you have with it?
We can father and carry children! The potential for this is inherent in every woman, even in a symbolic sense if she does not have children. Even if a woman’s uterus has been removed, it continues to exist energetically. The Yoni also creates an important connection to the heart and is the woman’s pleasure center.
How can we reconnect with the Yoni?
By stepping into our femininity. This means being receptive, touching yourself and allowing yourself to be touched. We should also touch each other’s pleasure centers, including our breasts, and give ourselves a massage every now and then. We therefore constantly remember the important aspects of femininity and keep this “core memory” in our heads and feelings.
How can a woman promote her femininity if she doesn’t necessarily want to massage herself or go for a yoni massage?
Dance! Dancing everywhere: while cooking, brushing your teeth, in front of the mirror, while washing. She doesn’t have to be at a rave party, it’s enough to circle the pelvis a little or she can tense and relax the pelvic floor in the office. Or, in front of the TV, she can just hold her breasts.
«The woman-to-woman massage is very nourishing. The massage does not have any erotic goals, but rather a maternal and protective energy»
Why do we humans still have so many taboos and ambiguities about sexuality, despite the sexual revolution in the 1970s?
We have a lot of beliefs, such as “Be careful of men or the policeman, don’t wear a skirt that’s too short!” Personally, I have been warned about men my entire life. The patriarchal system, in which men simply did not always behave appropriately, has influenced our psyche and our bodies. Religions certainly also have a strong influence on our moral ideas. We women were given a lot of things that had a big impact on us. Under no circumstances were you allowed to touch each other or feel pleasure.
What can we as individuals, especially women, do to improve these conditions?
As women, we should model healthy femininity and also enable our children to have a healthy approach to sexuality. No taboos, no shame and no fear to pass on. We can set an example. Not literally in front of them, of course, but through literature and open answers to questions, stimulated communication about sexuality and feelings. We can also demonstrate and address the equality of men and women.
What are typical patterns for women to suppress their sexuality? I myself did top-class sports for decades and as a result no longer had any libido.
Yes, extreme sports are not good for women to build libido. Moderate exercise can be good. In depression, libido is also very reduced. Unfortunately, with hormonal contraception, the libido is very weakened, and certain women no longer feel like it. When I used hormonal contraception, my libido was gone!” Women also need to learn to relax deeply, let go and surrender. It is also important to ask yourself the question, how do I feel about myself and my body?
How do you deal with it when a woman has had a bad experience regarding her sexuality?
I talk to the woman first and ask what brings her to me. Basically, the women inform me if they have had a bad experience or an attack. I find out with the woman what she needs and don’t touch her yoni in the first session. It is very important that the woman moves from the powerlessness of having to endure something to finding self-empowerment again. She decides. This means that the woman decides what, when and how something happens.
My final question: How can we make our environment a good place for women?
By listening to what women have to say and taking it seriously – including women among themselves. We should support each other, not compete. That requires inner size!
Thank you, Eliza!
We had the expert talk with Eliza Dadak.
Sexological Body Worker, Doula and Sexual Empowerment Coach.
Follow on IG: frau_zeit
